First "Beyond the Bankroll" Investment Since I Started

I've mentioned before in my blogs that one of the key factors when playing poker was to never invest anything into it from outside the bankroll. If I went bust I would not play ever again. It was a psychological decision to prove to myself that I this hobby would not turn into a gambling habit. Being addicted to the game of poker, that's fine. But gambling, that's a big no, no.

So after my initial $75 investment late in 2005 I have not spent a single further dime on poker - apart from a £5 yearly subscription to Pokerplayer Magazine. This act of frugalness is probably the reason why I'm so protective of what RTR call my infamous bankroll. Ignoring the size of it for the stakes that I play it (it truly throbs), what probably concerns me more is the amount of time and emotional investment there is in it. At its lowest it was down to $7, at it's highest... well it's where it is today, considerable more than $7.

But a couple of days ago I caved in and use my credit card to purchase something for poker. Although there is no question that I'm not bad at the game, I've done little in recent months to educate myself. I've just been playing hands and using the experiences from that. This is, of course, narrow-minded and is probably what's causing some interesting discussions about my nittyness in the RTR staking thread I have. I've accepted that this may be the case so I my credit card purchase has been on a subscription to Deuces Cracked. It's one of the many video tutorial sites that promise that the money you invest in them will be rewarded with more profits almost instantly. I have no doubt of that for mid-stake players but for micro stake players the investment is quite expensive. But, as we all know, I have an infamous bankroll.

You could argue that since my bankroll could afford it I'm not actually spending money outside the bankroll and I may even cancel the subscription after my 7-day free trail - thus spending no money at all. But it's another symbolic step in poker journey. In the last month I've been staked (for a tiny profit at the moment), moved up to a higher level and found my feet (I think) and made a commitment to expanding my knowledge of the game. Baby steps, but steps none the less.

Now, in an odd twist, tonight will be the first time in a month that I'm actually buying in to anything. The RTR admin/mods vs the forum bounty tournament. I've got $10 on my head for $5 tournament. As I said to mik, this must be the first time I've willing entered a negative EV tournament.

I'm obviously starting to lose it.